FPs: What Are They & "How Do I Know If I Am One?"

 Hellooo, baddies! I'm in an excellent mood as I type this, and I hope you're all doing great as well. Today, we're talking about FPs, AKA favorite person(s). This post is targeted more towards my non-BPD audience, because I'd like to share more information about what this is so you can know if you are someone's FP and if you are, you can learn how to interact with them and treat them so both of you can have a healthy relationship. 

So what exactly is an FP? FP is the abbreviation for "favorite person". Borderlines all have an FP, and this person means the world to them. This person can be a best friend, a partner, a family member, anyone really. For me, I have multiple FPs. My mood depends entirely on them. For example, if they leave me on delivered for more than five minutes, I freak out, and that brings us to the topic of splitting. 

Splitting in simple terms, as I mentioned before, is when a borderline's mood and perception of themselves or others changes in an instant due to a small occurence. When I split on one of my FPs, my brain changes my view on them completely. I will suddenly think "they hate me; they're a terrible person; they're ghosting me; they're gonna leave me; I hate them; I did something wrong". Almost all these feelings are negative, but if my FP for example texts me back, or spams me with messages, or reassures me, I'll feel better and split back. 

Splitting is a big problem, but it can be managed. I unfortunately do not have any information on how to do that because I still struggle with splitting, but I hope this post has informed you a little on splitting. Let's get back to our topic of FPs. 

How do you know if you are someone's FP? It's actually quite simple. Ask yourself these questions and if you answer yes to more than half of them, you may be someone's FP.

- Do they (the borderline) make time for you even when they're incredibly busy, and prioritize you?

- Do they go out of their way to service you and do things for you?

- Do they confide in you about their biggest problems?

- Do they constantly show a need for your approval and reassurance?

- Are they often jealous of anything that involves you but doesn't include them?

- Do they get upset if you leave them for the shortest amount of time?

Now, you know whether or not you're someone's FP. Now, here is a list of what you should expect as an FP:

- They will have a constant need for your attention, approval, validation, and reassurance.

- Intense declarations of their love for you

- Reaching out more when you don't respond (spam texting)

- Grand fear that you will leave them or no longer love them

- Being in crisis often and only feeling well with your advice and guidance and presence

- Showing extreme jealousy towards other people or things in your life; anything that isn't them

While being an FP is a big responsibillity, it's also an amazing thing to be able to help someone with a difficult disorder like BPD. I hope you all learned something from this post, and I'm so very glad I'm able to educate everyone on this topic. Bye-bye, baddies!